130430

• I'm fidgeting to log out today. I'll receive the results of the bloody graduate entrance exam I took yesterday at USC. 
• I sure hope I would pass. The graduate program would open more doors for me in participating on government activities - an agency which aims to serve all of its people if not for the better. 
• Government has unlimited possibilities. It is a good ground to start helping people in need.
• Being a religious is still a far option form my mind.. I can't imagine myself being able to stay for long.
• I still wish to enter the vocation of marriage. The vocation of single blessedness and religious doesn't sound as attractive. But whatever God's will is, I would joyfully and whole heartedly embrace it. 
• I remember the last message of my manghud, like three days ago (hahay kadugay na wala napud gaparamdam ang gwapo huhu), he told me that that person should "just be around the corner, nasa tabi2 lang. baka kasi iniisnab ko tapos nahihiya lang lumapit kasi akala ang dami ko ng achievements". Funny how he puts it that way.. I do reject any attention given by a male specie right away knowing his intentions are not as important. I also make sure I don't entertain any conversation which doesnt stimulate my interest. Or maybe I intentionally disregard their existence because I have found the only male creature which I am interested in engaging with. Or doesn't he just get the fact that I don't entertain other men because of him?Even when he didn't have to tell me so. Parang voluntary act lang ba, but he seems to push me away. Tskkkk.
• As of the moment, I am entirely comfortable with any relationship I have with the people around me. There are no complications and all I have are positive vibes. I purposely turn my back to people which does the contrary. I mean, what do I need them for? Maybe I'm committing the sin of omission for not lending a hand to those people who needs my assistance, But it surely is not in my convenience if I do so.. And what do I get in return? But then again, when you genuinely want to help other people, one should not ask for any favors in return. This is such a battle I have to face with myself. HAHA. For now, I enjoy being enclosed in my own narrow world. Uhm is this something I need to address? :3
• Regarding that swap Precious has requested earlier, argh, I wanted to decline. But I might need a return favor someday. Of course I expect that. All I wanted was a complimentary taxi ride on my way home. It is not easy to work 6am after a 9pm end of shift the previous day -_-
• I sure am gonna miss my 6am shift. Hmmmm -_-

130410

• I must admit. I am afraid. Ignore warning
• I am like at the brink of giving up on love. Expectation is the least word I can befriend. I wonder why it seems to be very difficult.
• Off to Maasin, Leyte in a while. I wonder what it awaits me :)

130409

• Early morning and I received a message from my manghud and Tita Shirley. The latter was just a quote and nice people, apparently that also makes me one. And as for manghud.. Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyy, it is the message I received three days from the previous one. Waaaaah three dayssss..!! How come it felt so long time ago already? Three days of just silence. Eventually it would be more than that. I can't bare to think that one day would come that we'd have no communication at all!! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahh T_T
• How did I get so used to his presence even with just the phone messages? And the less-than rare meet ups
• I've been hard on myself that I also want to be hard on others. I know it's not right. But I want it to be FAIR!! Okay, I admit I have issues. But not THAT worse, just manageable :]I have to stop thinking about my manghud. And any whereabouts on him. How is that possible? :3
• I'll be leaving tomorrow for Maasin, I dont know what awaits me. But I feel like I need it! ♥

130405

• Sometimes, you just want to have someone who can relate to you, or at least listen to all your woes carefully as if they're on the same road.. Sometimes that matters.. Sometimes you just want someone to be there for you and whom you can talk to..
• With manghud and me, I believe this is the start of a drifting relationship (friendship if there's any). I can't even bear to think about it that I drown myself with my job and the org. Two things which I only have right now, aside from family and friends who lead different lives. I have a different one FYI, all of us has.

130404

• All I have are praises for him, what went wrong?
• "The Will of God never takes you to where the Grace of God will not protect you."
• I've learned how to encourage because I was blatantly encouraged, by no less than manghud. I learned it the sweet way <3
• It seems that we're running out of things to talk about. EOC? #sameperson

130402

• It's a happy first day of work this April. News flash, I'm not late and I'm early!! Hoorah!
• How can I pretend I haven't met one of the best people I met in my entire existence?
• Isn't it impossible to pretend that a part of me has changed or has been moved just because of his existence? :(
• He ignored me just all of a sudden!! Where's justice?? I ought to hear any kind of explanation, right?
• I strongly believe I deserve a concrete explanation. Hmp :(
• All my hopes are gone. I won't expect any messages from him anytime soon. Just kill me. NOT.
• Why are there people who wants to complicate life? Grr.
• Sometimes, life has it that it means a lot to you, but entirely nothing to them. You just gotta accept it. And don't forget to MOVE ON :) </3